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Suggestions for Enhancing Your Relationships with Your College Student

As a parent or guardian, your support, guidance and direction have assisted your student’s

acceptance into a top-ranked public institution. For many parents and guardians, raising a

child is one of their most significant investments. As a parent, you have helped your student

successfully navigate the educational process, resulting in their enrollment at Clemson.

Sending a child to college often creates a variety of emotions for parents. Much literature

exists to help, but we would suggest you simply do what you have done to ensure the success

of your student up to this point. The following are five beneficial tips to aid a successful

transition from high school to college.

1. Ride the Emotional Roller Coaster and Practice Soft Skills

The next few years will seem like a roller coaster for you. There will be ups and downs, twists

and possible mistakes made along the way. Your student will need your patience, a listening

ear and a healthy dose of empathy. You know your student better than anyone. Listen to them

and allow them to solve their own problems themselves. Trust you have done a great job

raising them. Remember this is their time to shine!

2. Promote Autonomy

Your natural inclination is going to be to solve everything for them in the next few years. We

urge you to not do this. They need to handle their own problems. Realize you will likely see and

talk less to your student. Wait for them to reach out — they will do so when and if it is needed.

This distance does not mean anything is wrong, it simply means they are becoming more

independent and becoming their own decision makers. Encourage them to utilize the

numerous campus resources, especially the free ones — the Academic Success Center, writing

centers, Counseling and Psychological Services, student organizations — and remember the

Clemson Parents website also offers many resources. Good parenting is learning to let go, and

everything up to this point has been about letting go. You created good boundaries for them,

and they will be successful because of the experiences you fostered.

3. Embrace Your Own Changes

Simply because you sent your child to Clemson does not mean you will not worry and share

concerns for them. Your worry does not go away — you will worry about their safety, what

they are doing and who they are hanging out with. When experiencing such feelings, remind

yourself there are hard-working, dedicated staff and faculty to help them. You will never

stop being their parent, but you can and should begin reframing that relationship. Work to

find the appropriate balance. Now is the time to think about yourself and what changes this

transition brings for you. One note — if this is your second student, it is likely easier, but do