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from movies. These movies often portray an unrealistic view

of the college roommate experience. The scenario typically

looks something like this: a student immediately (usually

on move-in day) becomes best friends with their roommate,

spends all of their time together, the room is always tidy and

eventually they end up in one another’s weddings. Students

also hear about college experiences from other people’s

stories: someone who had a roommate that used their things,

ate their food, was very messy, etc. At this point, students

anticipate the absolute best or the absolute worst scenarios

for their experience. In reality, roommate living probably falls

somewhere in between. At Orientation each year, we ask our

students how many of them have ever had roommates, and

the majority share they have never had a roommate, or even

had to share a bathroom. It is incredibly valuable for your

student to have realistic expectations of what this experience

will be like. They most likely won’t be best friends on the first

day. Relationships take time to establish, and it is realistic to

think they may have some disagreements about things. They

will most likely have very different ways of doing things. This

is absolutely normal. Living with someone can be incredibly

rewarding, and your student will be gaining more from this

experience than they probably even realize. Guide them in

figuring out how to get through these areas of conflict.

For more information about living and dining on campus,

visit

clemson.edu/housing-dining .

Things to Consider

• Encourage your student to attend on-campus events, go see a movie or eat meals with their

roommate. By setting aside time to spend with one another, they will begin to understand each

other better.

• Encourage open-mindedness in your student and their roommate relationship. They can learn a

lot from someone whose background, culture, values and interests are different from their own.

• Advise your student to communicate expectations and avoid frustration. They should discuss

individual expectations with their roommate. It is normal for roommates to have different

expectations. Coming to a common agreement on what is expected for a living space is an

important part of living with another person. Some topics to address are study habits, sleep

schedules, items for sharing, items for personal use, visitation hours and cleanliness.

• Encourage them to talk it out with respectful communication. Students should speak openly

PARENT TESTIMONIAL

“From our own experiences,

we knew the important role

a roommate plays in having

a successful first year,

especially for out-of-state

students like our student.

Clemson’s online roommate

personality assessment test

was extremely useful in finding

a good match. After selecting

each other, our student and

their roommate continued

to communicate over the

summer. It was comforting

to know our student knew

at least one person before

arriving on campus. Amazingly,

they have a lot in common,

and we like the roommate’s

parents as well.”

Gail Van Cleave

Troy, Mich.