

residential experience is transformative. REM provides a student experience
that supports the valuable learning opportunities existing outside of the
classroom. The intent is to engage with residents as individuals and connect
them to campus life and all it has to offer. The belief is that students who
live on campus will grow in four areas: self-exploration, living in community,
intellectual engagement and global citizenship.
Talking Through Roommate Conflicts
Most of the students would agree
their first impression of college and
having a roommate comes from
movies. These movies often portray
an unrealistic view of the college
roommate experience. The scenario
typically looks something like this:
a student immediately (usually on
move-in day) becomes best friends
with their roommate, spends all of
their time together, the room is always
tidy and eventually they end up in
one another’s weddings. Students
also hear about college experiences
from other people’s stories: someone
who had a roommate that used their
things, ate their food, was very messy,
etc. At this point, students anticipate
the absolute best or the absolute
worst scenarios for their experience.
In reality, roommate living probably
falls in between these two scenarios.
At Orientation each year, we ask
our students how many of them
have ever had roommates, and the
majority share they have never had
a roommate, or even had to share a
bathroom. It is incredibly valuable
for your student to have realistic
expectations of what this experience
will be like. They most likely won’t
be best friends on the first day.
Relationships take time to establish,
and it is realistic to think they may
have some disagreements about
things. They will most likely have very
different ways of doing things. This is absolutely normal. Living with someone
can be incredibly rewarding, and your student will be gaining more from this
experience than they probably even realize. Guide them in figuring out how
to get through these areas of conflict.
For more information about living and dining on campus, visit
clemson.edu/ housing-dining.PARENT TESTIMONIAL
“Our son’s freshman roommate
experience has been less than
optimal. Basically, they are
both quiet and therefore, they
go days and weeks without
speaking. This created a lonely
environment in which to live.
Their relationship is not hostile,
but it is definitely not good.
We have coached, advised and
even pleaded with our son to be
the initiator, but he is hesitant
to do so. As much as we have
wanted to ‘come to the rescue,’
we realize there are life lessons
being learned and character
and maturity being forged in
this difficult experience. Part
of growing up is learning to
deal with people and navigating
relationship issues.”
Rhonda Barinowski
North Augusta, S.C.
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